9/9/2003 05:08:36 AM|||Amy|||What better place to complain than one's own blog? My husband and the father of my three small forest animals (or rather - two forest animals and one former British prime minister. Baby is very good at impersonations of said historical figure so we've started calling her Winston) is asleep. He sleeps as it suits him. I, on the other hand, only sleep as sort of an afterthought. It's as if my body realizes that I am sitting down and nursing, so what better time to catch a little snooze? When I wake up and see with a great deal of relief that Winston hasn't landed on the floor, it is with thanks that I whisper a little prayer and simultaneously curse myself for not being able to stay awake. On top of everything else, I find my husband's comatose sessions a hateful expression of our marital dysfunction. Why couldn't we just limit our agression to fighting?

I drove up to work today to resolve some insurance issues. It's about 20 miles each way, and as I drove I realized that if I were a passenger in that car as well as the driver, I would be praying for somewhere to jump out to safety. As a passenger, I would be considering my chances of throwing myself out of a moving car on a busy highway versus staying on for the remainder of the ride. I need sleep.

Is this the way it is for other mothers? I know this will all get easier as Winston matures, but for now I will continue to relieve some of the pressure by vocalizing.

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