1/16/2005 03:42:57 AM|||Amy|||Not that I know this for sure, I mean, John has probably been getting laid for years off and on (by someone other than me) - but I think tonight would have probably been one of the notable nights if the divorce weren't a possible 5 days away. He left here at noon today in my car to spend some time with friends, and now it's almost 4am. I just extricated myself from a pile of kids, and figured what the hell - I should write about it.

The divorce may happen on Thursday. My lawyer is starting to get kind of pissed off on how long it's taken us to get rolling, and so is making pushing sounds. I can almost literally hear him grunting as he encourages the process along.

I'm all for it, so I have taken out things from the decree that John feels are completely unreasonable, such as child support - but fought for things which I absolutely cannot go without, such as that the kids and I can live anywhere without geographic restriction. John feels (though he says just the opposite) rightly that he is screwing me over monumentally. He doesn't think the line about me living wherever I want will hold up in court as long as I have custody of the kids before they turn 18, and he doesn't have to pay child support.

He doesn't have a job, and won't sign the decree as long as there is a dollar amount listed for child support. The problem is that John may actually figure out a way to support himself forever without a reportable income, and thus never feel obligated to provide for his kids - just as he hasn't felt obligated for the last two years.

He sent me an email at work the other day asking why it was that when a man stays home to take care of the kids, he's unemployed - but when a woman does it, she's a homemaker. I am grateful that he didn't say that to me verbally. In John's case, he is unemployed. Staying home and taking care of the kids was never something we agreed that he would do. I work for the state for fuck's sake - how could he ever have imagined that I make enough to support a family of five? I have been scraping for the last two years to meet basic expenses, and we would probably be living in a crack house if it weren't for my parents. John decided that earning an income was beneath him, and refused to do anything that would help support his family financially. His lack of enthusiasm over being a decent father has caused a great deal of head scratching for my parents and me. Our heads are goddamned bloody from all the scratching.
|||110586895032592520|||Wherein I Lay Out My Hypocrisy in Stunning Colors of Kodachrome Magic1/17/2005 01:07:23 PM|||Judy The Great|||Sheesh. John's an idiot. I guess he doesn't realize that you can go back into court and have child support added back in. Even if the divorce is final, everything in the papers is changable if you are willing to go back to the lawyer and have it done.

He's a big fucking asshole for not providing for his family and for insisting that he not have to help support his children after the divorce. I hope he get's deported. Yes really I do, what a loser.