Kangatopia

Just in case it wasn’t immediately apparent:  I’m taking a break.  I’m all out of ways to say things without actually saying them, and since I appreciate the quality of being discrete (even if I’m shit at practicing it), I haven’t had anything to write about that wouldn’t break the taboos that have been set up.  I’m too busy, depressed, stressed, lazy etc.  What I need is not a vacation, but a new way of looking at things.  I’ve been reading this book, Freedom’s Way, and while it helps me momentarily, I haven’t figured out how to sustain the revelations I have while reading it.  I need to figure something out because what I’ve been feeling lately just isn’t good.

Conversely, my parenting skills seem to have gotten a very postive boost.  I’ve got lots of good influences around me these days, and good influences are just what I need.  Now, if those same influences could influence me to pull my head out of my ass and deal with the things that are making me personally miserable…  At least, I have identified what I’m using to feel miserable and I have also come to terms with the concept that I am more guarded than previously believed.  I don’t want to discuss these things with anyone other than my therapist, and some of them I can’t bring myself to talk about even with her except in indirect ways.  The cures are the provacateurs.  Or the disease.

So, even though I didn’t intend this post to be another explanation of why I suspect I am deeply neurotic, it has become thus.  I have to whine a little to get to the other stuff.

Last night I made these little peanut butter, wheat germ and honey balls for Jack who is quarantined just at the moment.  (The truth is far more interesting than the evasion, but I can’t tell you what’s going on out of respect for his privacy.)  I added blueberries against the advice of the recipe, and may have distorted the tastyness just a bit for the healthy goodness.

Monkey has become quite the orator.  Her one liners are pretty gosh darned mature for a 4 year old.  Winston, too, has picked up speed on her verbal communication skills.  I always want to cheer when she says “okay” in response to any yes/no question.  Bear is officially on his way to the King Tut exhibit in Chicago in June.  Now, I just have to decide which liquor store to knock over.

Maybe if some blessed goddess or muse smiles beneavolently on me, I will find inspiration for blogging again.  But, just for now, I am on my dinner break.